Thursday, June 22, 2006

Your New York Knickerbotchers

Perhaps you should heed your own advice, Isiah.

Isiah Thomas, for my money, is the worst NBA general manager of all-time. Now he is set to become (again) the worst coach/GM of all time. He has replaced saved Larry Brown his dignity.

This shouldn't come as a huge shock. In fact, for shock value it's kind of like having a friend that you just know is gay and should come out of the closet, and then he does, and you say to yourself, "Wow! I knew it, I just knew it, but... WOW!" Isiah Thomas is that gay man.

So, you might ask yourself, what exactly has Mr. Thomas done for the Knicks that they want him to have the two most important jobs on an NBA franchise? Lest you forget, he gave up a fantastically great trade commodity in Anfernee "I'm Worth About a Penny" Hardaway and his "Worth Quite a Few Pennies" contract for a suffocatingly, debilitatingly overpaid, overrated tweener of a head-case (Stevie "McDonald's Franchise"), who has proved that he doesn't have the chops to win at practically any level (I won't speak for his high school career).

In fact, Stevie's still trying to make his long-distance relationship with Cuttino Mobley last.

By the way, that move (made last year around the trade deadline), is what HoopsHype calls Isiah's best transaction as Knick GM. Best.

Okay, so what's his worst, according to HoopsHype? Signing Jerome James last offseason. You remember Jerome James - inflated center, played for the Sonics, in the playoffs had one decent, Dampier-esque game versus the Spurs, got tons of undeserved money in a contract tied up by one Isiah Thomas? Ring a bell? Yep, THAT Jerome James.

I, for the record, have not held office in any NBA front office, but when you have a hall-of-fame coach, you should really give him more than a year to piece things together into a winning formula - especially with the talent the Knicks have.

I will give this to Isiah, during last year's draft, he did alright. Well, he would have done alright if he had the slots on the roster for those guys.

Channing Frye - Center? Nope. At best I would call him a 4/5. You know, kind of like Eddy Curry or Malik Rose?

Nate Robinson - He sure is fun to watch isn't he? Too bad he's a shooting guard in a tiny point guard's body and plays kind of like Stephon Marbury and Steve Francis - at least he fills THAT need, they DEFINITELY didn't have THAT covered.

David Lee - I like him, he hustles, and in fact, he might have been one of the brightest guys for the Knicks' future... if he could see the court behind Jalen Rose, Quentin Richardson, Jamal Crawford, and Qyntel Woods.

Speaking of Qyntel Woods... Need I say more?

Remember when the Knicks had hustle players? Players like Nazr Mohammed and Kurt Thomas - they're gone now, have been for a year or so. You know what the genius got for them? Malik Rose and Quentin Richardson.

You don't want me to get started on Quentin either. He and his head-bopping kin Darius Miles can go double up Brandy for all I care.

Knicks payroll last season : $123 million.

Sure, Isiah inherited a lot of that loot, but he's been with the Knicks since 2003 and hasn't made a dent in it (kind of like certain presidents with the National Debt). So one would think that since the average contract is probably 3-years, that in 2006 this number would be drastically better.

Knicks probable payroll this coming season: $125 million +.

Heckuva job, and one heckuva good reason to give this guy the coaching reins. After all, it's pretty much "fact" that he gets along with everyone (cough, Michael Jordan, cough, Larry Bird, cough, Rosco, cough) so he shouldn't have ONE problem dealing with the super-inflated egos on the Knicks roster. Not ONE problem - you heard it here first (ahem).

But... Do you want to know why this REALLY pisses me off? Because the Knicks will be as badas last year, if not worse (put the smart money on worse), the Knickerbockers will continue to compete with the Trail Blazers for worst record, and hence the best chance at squeezing out the number 1 pick, and likely Greg Oden with it. And, since it's New York, home of the NBA HQ, they WILL get the number one pick (and with it Greg Oden), because the NBA is rigged (don't fine me, Mr. Stern).

Greg Oden. And then, Isiah will somehow look like a genius.

Isiah Thomas: "You're fired, Larry."
Larry Brown: "Fantastic, I'm already packed!"

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