Sunday, December 10, 2006

Halftime from Chelsea-Arsenal



Firstly, congratulations are due to Chelsea and to their coach, Jose Mourinho, in particular. Even during Manchester United's heyday of dominating the EPL, they never reached the heights that Chelsea have achieved thus far. All you need to do is watch a single half of one of their games to realize that they have built the finest team to hate in decades, possibly since Bremner's Leeds side.

It all starts from the top. There's nothing like a manager who refers to himself as "The Special One", whose default expressions are either "smug" or "petulant" and is known for over-the-top celebrations and remonstrations, depending on which aforementioned mood is in style. Today has already had an excellent Mourinho Moment, consisting of him strutting out of the coach's box, through Wenger's box and 10 yards down the sideline so that he could yell at the ref about Ashley Cole receiving a yellow card for a tackle that was well, a yellow-card offense.

Of course, I don't know if the match official heard what The Special One had to say because he was surrounded by a scrum of Chelsea players, all bleating at the top of their lungs about perceived injustices. And really, this is the basis for Chelsea's villany. They're a bunch of whiners. They complain about everything that goes against them and even when they feel like things haven't gone good enough. The addition of Ashley Cole to a squad that already has Drogba, Lampard, Carvalho, Makalele and Ballack is a masterstroke, a move that nudges the squad further in the direction of the Whiner's Tabernacle Choir, a force to be reckoned with in the world of wheedling and generally being a complete ass.

Seriously, it's a pity that the churlishness of Chelsea takes away from what is a superlative team. Mourinho is the top tactical manager in the EPL currently, as evidenced by his move to play Essien as right wing-back to take advantage of Giggs pushing inside in the game against Man U at Old Trafford, a move that was the fulcrum of Chelsea's domination of the second half and one that Alex Ferguson never countered. Drogba, for all of his diving and gesticulations, may be the best player in the world right now, a brutal combination of skills, pace and strength. In fact, the latter is an impressive attribute across the board at Chelsea, with Arsenal thus far looking like the kid who gets sand kicked in his face in the old Charles Atlas ads.

Anyhow, got to get back to the hating. Maybe Chelsea'll bring Robben in and he can whine about losing his hair.

Comments on "Halftime from Chelsea-Arsenal"

 

Blogger Ross Conkey said ... (9:43 AM) : 

THERE WILL BE NO ROBBEN HATING ON THIS BLOG!

Keep up the good work, EZ!

 

Blogger Thomas M. said ... (11:36 PM) : 

You can't deny dude is losing his hair though. Man has a fivehead!

That said, he was the best player on the pitch when he came on in the second half. I know Mourinho is trying to bed Ballack and Sheva into the side, I can't help thinking that they'd be more effective with Robben and Joe Cole out there instead (this is somewhat mitigated by the fact that Cole's been hurt all year).

PS - There's some bogus spam comments on the CL match report entry. If you could delete them, that would be sweeeeet.

 

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